I spent last week in Los Angeles (largely West Hollywood) and overheard so much gold (including a couple of celebrity contributions) I had to share:
“You know Bruce? The homeless guy? I saw him driving a Mercedes the other day.”
— one 7-Eleven employee to another
“All I drink is tap water.”
— Larry David to woman near Runyon Canyon
“Some people are really fantastic and some people are really…”
— restaurant patron
“I know it bums some people out it or whatever but it makes me really, really happy when somebody says that they like my band.”
— pedestrian on Hollywood Boulevard
“I do elliptical and yoga every day and I drink a shitload of green juice.”
— Russell Simmons to female hiking companion on Runyon Canyon
“Just when you think it isn’t going to happen, you see Russell Simmons hiking and talking about drinking a shitload of green juice.”
— one hiker to another immediately after seeing Russell Simmons talking about drinking a shitload of green juice
“Can I get a taste of the brown? It’s pretty brown.”
— restaurant patron to bartender
“I’m sick and tired if buying coffee. It’s like a waste of 8 dollars?”
— one guy wearing a Smiths t-shirt to another
“You want me to do what? I just met you.”
— woman to man, both exiting Cabo Cantina
“Why’d you say vagina?”
“I said San Francisco Giants.”
— little girl to father and father’s response
“I don’t know but I stuffed another big rug down there.”
— Runyon Canyon hiker
“She literally said the next day, ‘my boobs have never been more sore.'”
— one female hiker to another